I am sitting at my table, cup of Coffee by my side. It’s 2 AM in the morning. Everyone is sound asleep and there’s not a noise to be heard in miles. Well, except for the gentle hum of the computer as it processes so much at once. Or is that my brain?
Truth is, I’m still awake because of you. Or rather, the thoughts of you that run incessantly through my mind. Boy, do they need to stop.
See, I know you and I know that if you were reading this, there would be a hint of a smile on your smug little face.
But you should stop smiling because you have absolutely no reason to.
Because the inevitable truth is that I hate you.
I hate how much it hurts when you’re not around and I hate how happy I am when you are.
I hate the way your eyes shine and how your hair falls perfectly into place.
I hate how you can give me that goofy smile of yours and my heart just instantly melts.
I hate how every vibration on my phone makes me look for your name and I hate how much it makes me grin when I find it.
I hate how I count the seconds till we next meet and how many precious seconds we have left when we are together.
I hate how vulnerable you make me feel, yet safe and secure at the same time.
But most of all, I hate how much I love every ounce of my hatred towards you.
So maybe it’s time to face the cold hard truth.
I don’t hate you at all and well, I really hate that.